Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Sometimes stuff just doesn't happen the way you want it to...

Well, the news I received wasn't what I was expecting.

The big secret is that I had an interview with a company that would have been a HUGE step up for me career-wise.  It would have been amazing, and working with the company would have been really exciting.  I would have been working alongside some awesome women close to my own age, in a fun environment, working in a position I would have been crazy excited about getting up and doing every single day.  The added bonus is I would be making twice the amount I'm making now salary-wise, PLUS benefits.  

And I nailed the interview.  I mean NAILED it.  It was the best one I've had in a really long time.

But I didn't get the job.

I guess they were looking for someone with more experience in that company's field, and although they really liked me, they had to go another direction. 

I couldn't have been more disappointed yesterday. 

I cried.  A lot. 

I try not to get too excited about something with an unknown outcome.  I tried really hard not to think of what I could do with this company.  I tried not to think of the fact that I could have my debt paid off before the end of this year with my new salary.  I tried not to start planning my new commute, or how I would decorate my new office.  But in the back of my mind, I still did.

And now I have to move on.  I feel like I've reached a crossroads in my life, and I have a choice to go one way or another.  I don't have a lot of freedom right now because of my debt, and that pisses me off to no end.  It limits my decisions, and makes me hate my debt even more.  I guess that's a good thing because I'll keep working as hard as I possibly can to be free of it.  But that doesn't change my feelings of being trapped right now.

Today is much better than yesterday.  Tomorrow will be even better.  I know I need to keep my chin up and just keep plugging away.  I had my time to mope, and now it's time to brush myself off and get on with my life.  After a glass of wine or 3, of course. ;)

Then this popped up in my Pinterest, and made me feel a lot better:

Well, I've already got most of that figured out.  I just need to find out what will make me happy work-wise, and do that.  It's simpler than I make it out to be, but that's really what matters in the end.

Just do what makes you happy.

I think I can do that.


jakeisfantastic said...

Hi Beth!

I have full confidence you'll find what you are looking for. I've known you for years. You're the kind of creative, resourceful person who always comes up with a solution.

Tao Te Ching says
"a lowly state is a boon.
Getting it is a pleasant surprise
and so is losing it!"

So, it's good to have challenges like this. After you find what you're looking for, you'll feel even better because you overcame them.

Valerie said...

I am sorry that this opportunity didn't work out for you, but I very much admire your attitude about it! With optimism like that, you are sure to find what you are looking for!